soundtrack of my life ..part 1

What is the soundtrack of your life? What is your currently theme song ? What song do you sing to perk up your spirit? this is mine...by oasis..whatever~~~

I'm free to be whatever I
Whatever I choose
And I'll sing the blues if I want

I'm free to say whatever I
Whatever I like
If it's wrong or right it's alright

Always seems to me
You only see what people want you to see
How long's it gonna be
Before we get on the bus
And cause no fuss
Get a grip on yourself
It don't cost much

Free to be whatever you
Whatever you say
If it comes my way it's alright

You're free to be wherever you
Wherever you please
You can shoot the breeze if you want

It always seems to me
You only see what people want you to see
How long's it gonna be
Before we get on the bus
And cause no fuss
Get a grip on yourself
It don't cost much

I'm free to be whatever I
Whatever I choose
And I'll sing the blues if I want

Here in my mind
You know you might find
Something that you
You thought you once knew
But now it's all gone
And you know it's no fun
Yeah I know it's no fun
Oh I know it's no fun

I'm free to be whatever I
Whatever I choose
And I'll sing the blues if I want

I'm free to be whatever I
Whatever I choose
And I'll sing the blues if I want

Whatever you do
Whatever you say
Yeah I know it's alright

Whatever you do
Whatever you say
Yeah I know it's alright

happy birthday leng 24-11-08

You have been such a wonderful friend to me. Both of us are leading such a life, my friend. A life at different spectrum's, colorful nonetheless :)

On your day, i wish you great health (to rock someone's life thoroughly someday), , exciting adventures and lots of happiness.

Happy birthday!

silent anxiety of control freak

Ever have one of those days where you feel as if you should be doing something to move along some aspect of your life? Like you know exactly where you need to be and what you need to do to get there but even though you have the will and gumption to do it, you have to wait for timing? Because of that requirement of timing, you feel as if you're not in control? I mean nothing is really standing in your way, you just have to wait for the train to get to you. But you have these nervous butterflies in your stomach and fear as if you don't move faster towards it, you might miss the opportunity? Your mind says, you have to wait for it. You agree whole-heartedly but there's something inside of you that causes you to try to find a way to make it happen NOW. WTF?! You know you would be ready even if it did happen at that instant, but you want it to happen nonetheless.

So you hold it inside and your brain is shuffling at light speed and you can't focus on anything. And all the while this is going on inside, you have this quietness on the outside. Nobody knows that chaos that's happening inside because you can't seem to control your anxiety. And you only have anxiety because you can't control time. WTF!? You try to find other things to occupy you and try to refocus but that ends up being a battle in itself. You finally relax not because you've conquered the anxiety but because your body is tired and you drift off into exhaust induced sleep. Only to wake youself up again with this growing hole inside that anxiety is still eating away at.

Psychosis. It's just the ever so quiet anxiety trip of a control freak.

The Last Goodbye

I don't believe you
And I never will
Oh I can't live by your side
With the lies you've tried to instill
I can't take anymore
I don't have to give you a reason
For leaving this time
Coz this is my last goodbye

It's like I hardly know you
But maybe I never did
It's like every emotion you showed me
You kept well hid
And every true word that you ever spoke
Was really deceiving
Now I'm leaving this time
Coz this is my last goodbye

I've gotta turn and walk away
I don't have anything left to say
I haven't already said before
I've grown tired of being used
And I'm sick and tired of being accused
Now I'm walking away from you
And I'm not coming back